Blowing The Whistle On Prada’s Levitation

This is a joke, right? Like, Prada was lazy and couldn’t think of something new to come out with and said, “Let’s put this thing out and watch all of these idiots bust a nut. Like, who the fuck is going to question us? We’re Prada.” Well Prada, I’m here to blow the whistle on your aggressively cornball tendencies and nah, bro, I ain’t buying your schtick. I didn’t buy that shit when you came out with those heinous ass creepers and I’m for sure, 100%, not buying it a second time around. Sell a gimmick once and shame on you. Sell a gimmick twice and STILL SHAME ON YOU FOR SELLING TERRIBLE, GROSS SHOES. What the fuck? Your "Levitate" series is embarrassing. Just like a bush league street magician "levitating" for a couple of bucks in front of a group of tourists, you're smoke screening the lowest common denominator. Yeah, real fucking admirable, guys. Anyone who buys these shoes deserves to have their purchasing power revoked, or maybe have their feet bound Song dynasty style on some real ruthless parenting shit. These shoes will have you looking like you belong in a Grimes video with those weird hoes that I’m sure haven’t used a bottle of Summer’s Eve in their entire lives. The worst part about these shoes is that I know I will see people wearing them. I know for a fact I will see some guy at Blink gym spending all of the money he saved on a gym membership to buy these $660 hybrids so he can climb up onto the StairMaster with them looking all “chic” and "fierce" and, oh yeah, really fucking stupid. Prada, congratulations, now please get all the way the fuck out of here.

  • KP

    AMEN!

  • KP

    Get that LA Lights bullshit out of here.

  • Young Breastmilk

    I remember I had a pair of Ecko loafers back in the day that had the same air bubble, walking around like I’m the baddest cause I didn’t have to change to play ball in the parking lot after church was over.

    • taylor

      P E A S A N T