Remembering Your First Cool Guy Wallet

I’m not actually advocating the resurgence of wallet chains, but this chain from Head Porter Plus got me thinking about my first cool guy wallet. I was in 6th or 7th grade and my dad and I were at some weird dirt mall for some reason. Anyways, those places always have the stores that sell leather goods and patches, ostensibly to bikers and biker gangs and, at the time, Vietnam vets. Regardless, it was in that weird, sad mall that I spied the wallet of my dreams. It was a black leather trifold wallet with a full color embroidering of everyone’s favorite X-Man, Wolverine, claws out and everythang. SHIT WAS FIRE. Plus, it had a chain. I walked into school that Monday looking like a goddamn badass, until the chain caught on my teacher’s desk after turning in my writing assignment and I semi-stumbled IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE CLASS. Hubris is a real thing, even for a sixth grader.