Rap Battle Punchlines

Yo, this visvim jacket is called a hoodie, but whatever because the most glaring problem with this jacket is the fact that it only has one lower pocket. Dawgs, do you realize that after purchasing this one thousand dollar jacket and waiting the subsequent infinity days for shipping, all that's gonna happen is you're going to go to drop your phone in your left pocket and BOOM iPhone shattered all over the sidewalk. That definitely sucks, but it's not really that hard to get a phone replaced these days. What's actually hard about the whole situation is pretending like you don't care in front of all your friends and whoever else might have witnessed your colossal gaffe. One time I chipped the corner of my phone when I missed one of the eight pockets I had on my cargo pants. I wasn't that concerned, but then everyone around me was like, "OH SHIT! YOU DROPPED YOUR PHONE, MOTHERFUCKER!" as if the best rap battle punchline of all time was just spit. For, like, a whole ten minutes I was bummed, but then I drank fifty whiskey gingers and I accidentally stepped on this really tall, pretty girl's sundress and I had a new social situation fail to focus on.

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  • Cee

    You forgot to mention the parcel string hanging out of the hoodie