NOT A Registered Sex Offender

Choctaw Ridge makes expensive underwear, so you know their expensive trunks will be legit. It seems like I’m seeing a lot of trunks this season. Are dudes finally gonna stop wearing basketball shorts or those calf-length Billabong joints we all bought 8 years ago at PacSun? Are we extending or sartorial sensibilities to the beach now? I’m the wrong guy to ask because all I wear to the beach is a bucket hat and my dick. JUST KIDDING, GUYS. I don’t live in Europe. And according to our demographics, a few of you don’t live in Europe either, which means we have to wear trunks to the beach if we want to stay off that totally annoying registered sex offender list.