Knowing Is Half The Battle

First off, let me make this very clear: I am not endorsing crop tops for dudes. In fact, even most girls look straight foolish in crop tops. Unless you're Nicki Minaj, you probably should avoid crop tops and whatnot. But, this crop top has a shirt sewn into it so it’s actually not a crop top at all. Instead it’s just a weird top. Weird tops are OK in my book. And when people shit all over how it looks like your moms shrunk your favorite sweater but you’re still insisting on wearing it because you have attachment issues, just tell them it’s Carven. Everyone has heard of Carven because I bet you Nina Garcia and Tim Gunn said it on Project Runway. They’ll still think you’re a goofy looking asshole, but at least they’ll know you’re a rich goofy looking asshole who buys designer crop tops that aren’t really crop tops. And knowing is half the battle.

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