Keep Your Crotch Strains To Yourself

You probably act like you’re over cargo pants, but we know you’re not. Just like we know you’re not over that girl who ripped your heart out freshman year by letting that Econ grad student fingerbang her at a graffiti party. I like these pants because they have a crotch gusset. I don’t know why I like crotch gussets so much. It’s not like my lifestyle involves a lot of activities that involve an extraordinary amount of strain in the crotchal region or anything. Although, who knows, maybe YOUR lifestyle absolutely requires reinforced crotches in your pants to the point where you won't even entertain a purchase that's crotch gusset-less. If that's the case, keep it to yourself. Ain’t nobody want to hear about that mess. I already know you're thankful for this post and that's good enough for me

  • Squires

    Crotch gusset or not, my eyeballs just vomited.