Check Out JCPenney’s $35 German Army Trainers

Wow JCPenney got them fucking heaterz, my guy. No longer do you have to troll German eBay to buy authentic GATs to save Deutschmarks, or worse, be like me and get hella butthurt on some Margielas. Instead, you can just swing by your local mall, pick these up for 35 bones and still have tons of cash left over for a heaping plate of General Tso chicken from Panda Express. JCP isn't stopping at low end Sambas either! They've got strug varsity jackets ($120!), strug colorblocked parkas ($60!) and clearance 5 panels ($14.99!). Praise be to the holy ghost of Woost Gawd.

  • Tony

    The olive military jacket is pretty good. The anorak ain’t bad either. This shit is Nick Woost’s Black Album.

    • OK_ok

      “Nick Woost´s Black Album”.

      Someone actually wrote that.

      • Ok ok, enough alread

        You’re the definition of annoying, troll. Your pic says it all. You’re a douche and everyone knows it.

        • anon

          Way to take the bait

  • ef

    Just buy Adidas instead! you cunts

    • BOOGA SNITZLE

      Addidas got those ugly ass stripes! fuck dat noise! I’m all about 35 dollar sneakers! slurping ramen noodles out ya girlfriends ass! BOOYAKASHA

  • http://danielheard.squarespace.com danielheard

    But that curvy suede detail. It’s the definition of store brand bullshit detailing.

  • BOOGA SNITZLE – ITS YA BOY!

    I copped al sizes! gonna sell on ebay as MMM! HOLLA ATCHA BOY!

  • anon

    da fuq ? gats at jc penney now. i’m behind the curve mang