Fashion Bloggers Are The New Millionaires (Seriously)

Bryan Boy makes more money than you. In fact, he makes so much money that he is on record, in the current global economic climate, saying that, "Now, $100,000 is not enough." Bryan Grey-Yambao continues, "For a young, upstart blogger, $100,000 may seem like a lot of money. [But] as a business, a legit business, $100,000 won't really bring you that far. You have a lot of expenses." GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE, BRYAN FUCKING BOY. THAT AIN'T TRUE. I'M AWARE OF SEVERAL BUSINESSES THAT OPERATE WELL UNDER 100K A YEAR. NAMELY, MY DRUG DEALER. HOMIE MAKES BANK FOR SITTING AT HOME ALL DAY WEIGHING OUT BAGS OF FREE RANGE ORGANIC WEED FOR DETROIT'S HIPSTER COMMUNITY, BUT NO WAY HE MAKES MORE THAN, LIKE, 38K A YEAR. AND HE HAS TO DEAL WITH THE CRIPPLING PARANOIA THAT GOES ALONG WITH SELLING LOTS AND LOTS OF ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES. BRYAN BOY FLYS TO EUROPE TO LOOK AT CLOTHES AND HAS A BLOG. BRYAN, I HAD A BLOG AND THAT SHIT DID NOT COST ANYTHING TO RUN.

According to this WWD article on the soaring income of fashion bloggers, all of us in menswear need to quit that shit with the quickness and get into the womenswear game because, evidently, they are fucking just shitting money over there. NO WONDER NOAH JOHNSON ABANDONED US FOR STYLEDOTCOM. I miss you, Noah, but now you definitely gotta buy me brunch the next time I'm in town, motherfucker.

Bryan Boy legit turned down a six figure offer to be an editor-at-large at a major publication. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH GUAP YOU MUST BE DIPPING YOUR TOSTITOS IN TO TURN DOWN AN EDITOR-AT-LARGE GIG? I'VE BEEN WRITING FOR FOUR PINS FOR, LIKE, 3 YEARS AND THEY WON’T EVEN LET ME PRETEND I'M THE ANDRE LEON TALLEY OF THE OPERATION. I BROUGHT THAT UP AS A JOKE ONCE AND WOOLF AND SCHLOSSMAN MADE ME SIT IN THE ROOM THEY FILM ALL THE COMPLEX TV SHOWS IN FOR AN HOUR AND A HALF. AND THAT ROOM IS NOT VERY BIG AND IS ALL GREEN INSIDE.

The most surprising revelations in this article full of surprising revelation? That there are style bloggers in Salt Lake City pulling down almost a million dollars a year from affiliate programs. THAT'S RIGHT, A BLOG CALLED "PINK PEONIES," STARTED BY ITS FOUNDER ONLY TWO YEARS AGO MAKES $960,000 in 12 months.

Marc Jacobs even paid bloggers $1,000-2,000 for a post on the Daisy fragrance campaign. THAT SHIT IS CRAZY. And according to internal documents that WWD obtained, Rebecca Minkoff paid Song of Style's Aimee Song 5 G-bars and was set to pay Ms. Fashion Toast herself, Rumi Neely, 3 grand to publish a photo wearing some bandanna print shorts from Minkoff's collection. FUCK. ME. SIDEWAYS. AYO MINKOFF, HOOK YA BOY UP WITH $350 AND I'LL WEAR YOUR SHIT HEAD-TO-TOE UNTIL THE DAY THEY PUT ME IN THE GROUND.

For a lot of people all this money flying around for sponsored posts seems at least problematic and, at most, unethical. But bloggers ain't journalists. Or, at least that seems to be their stance when questioned about how sponsored posts influence their readers. And to be honest, that's a whole 'nother rant for your asses. Right now, I'm just fucking livid that I'm trying to renegotiate my student loan debt and Bryan Fucking Boy won't get out of bed for anything less than one hundred thousand dollars. FUCK MY LIFE, GUYS. WHY DID I HAVE TO LIKE CARGO PANTS AND NOT SHORT SHORTS? BRB I'M CTRL+ALT+DLT’ING MY ENTIRE EXISTENCE IN #MENSWEAR AND GONNA FIND A BROLIC BOYFRIEND WHO I WILL FORCE INTO TAKING PICTURES OF ME MAKING SASSY POSES WHILE WEARING REBECCA MINKOFF RESORT 2015 AND WATCH THE MONEY PILE UP.

  • http://thebeeobee.com/ thebeeobee

    ehhh….

  • yes

    This dude is a total herb.

  • Dan Noir

    just give it another eleventy billion years, until basic men start getting on that ‘not looking like complete shit’ train, and you too will be swimming in dough

  • Noah Johnson

    $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

  • freshgear99

    dude calm down with the CAPS. nobody wants to read more than 2 sentences of CAPS

    • Jon

      THANKS FOR THE ADVICE

  • MiamiMan

    Who is reading all these blogs? It’s easier to just go to fashion week. It’s not THAT hard to get into a few shows. I will never understand why anyone would live vicariously through a damn blog.

  • Jordan Baird

    lol @ people I know who saw this and are trying to start blogs now.

  • Chief Queef

    I swear to gawd i wanna sniff that fashion toast bitches asshole