Be Your Bike’s Wingman

Ever wanted your bike to hold it’s own cash/condoms/miscellaneous bike goods? But you don’t want to put a basket on it and have all the other lady bikes laugh at it? I mean, you want your bike to have the finest lubed up bike chain gang sex possible, right? Well then, you might want to hook up your bike with ITS OWN WALLET, MOTHERFUCKERS. Look at this thing. This is a stone cold, grade A bike wallet. Now, I’ve never really seen a B grade bike wallet, but that’s not the point. According to UNIONMADE, this thing “conveniently mounts on frame.” I don’t ever recall, in recent memory, wanting a bike wallet that didn’t conveniently mount on frame, so, that’s a plus. How are you not going to put up $130 and get your bike the best dirty handlebar sanchez it’s ever had in its entire life? It’s the least you can do.