The Transitive Property Of Cute Girls Liking Nature

Wilder Quarterly is a magazine that looks to be designed specifically for one type of person. And you know this person. In fact, you may be this person. Do you have a Tumblr/blog/Instagram dedicated to the outdoors? Do you forage, grow or hunt all the food you eat? Do you take photos of kids playing outside and caption it with trite bullshit like, “Thank God, not an iPad in sight”? THERE’S NOTHING WORSE THAN LUDDITES EXCEPT LUDDITES THAT AREN’T REALLY LUDDITES, BUT JUST PRETENTIOUS PEOPLE WHO PRETEND THEY DON’T WATCH TV BECAUSE THEY WATCH IT ON A TABLET INSTEAD. Shout out to people who think consumer culture is killing the human race and our environment, while simultaneously killing trees to print a magazine about reconnecting with nature. Not into nature? Well, that cute girl with braids is into nature. Therefore, you are into nature. Transitive property, motherfucker. Now buy this magazine and get in her pants.

  • Arty Artisan

    Little late to the table here…
    but I would have girl in slide 2 eat the fish on the opposite page then fart right in my face. Then we would have unsurprisingly mediocre sex because in my experience these sorts of white people (the whole throwback, artisinal this, artisinal that) super curated life experience type are boring as fuck and terrible in the sack.