Imagining North West And Blue Ivy Carter’s Future Friendship Milestones

My life could not be even remotely sadder so this week I’m gonna write about two people who’ve done nothing interesting except emerge from multi-million dollar lady flowers. Everything that follows will absolutely, 100% happen. My crystal ball that is also Perez Hilton’s seventh horcrux revealed it to me. So strap in and get ready to see how the entirety of Blue Ivy and North West’s friendship will play out so you never, ever have to think about them again.

Rick Morrison is a writer living in North Carolina. Follow him on Twitter here.

  • Noah Dillon

    This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever read

  • OK_ok

    An orgie caught on tape including Kanye, Thom Browne, Nick Wooster and the creative director of Engineered Garments (whoever that is)……. – Four Pins would fucking EXPLODE in fanboy-ism and dickriding

    • Lawrence

      C’mon, man…we don’t like Thom Browne THAT much.

      Also, Daiki Suzuki much? ZZZzzzzzzzZZZZzzzzz

  • Guest

    Holy fucking shit u guys have some MENTAL issues

  • Guest

    worst piece of shit of all times (I stopped after 5)

  • Philip Oudshoorn

    This the kinda shit I like to read

  • Europe

    Tibet doesn’t have a coast.

    • Cusack

      Global warming amps up in the future. It’s like the movie 2012, but y’know, many years later.

  • Prince Gumball

    I don’t even know why I’m laughing so hard

  • Tommy

    what the fuck did i just read

  • Fawizium

    What the actual fuck? Are you bored or something?