How To Pull Off A Proper Twitter Rant

The Twitter rant is the new move for increasing your internet presence these days. Sure, you could continue impressing people with your singular talents and work ethic, but this isn’t an episode of Saved by the Bell. People only care if you’re funny or pretty. Or crazy. And we all know only your moms thinks you’re pretty. I mean, we all only follow Kanye West just in the hope that he takes to Twitter for late night rants about why it’s hard to wear leather pants. Like, I could give two shits about when his new album is coming out. And if I did, I would follow some kid in Boston that posts the leak link. Instead, I NEED to hear about how I don’t understand songwriting and the surreal experience that is celebrity. For real, Kanye West is the first hit when you Google “Twitter rant”. My other personal favorite Twitter rants come from politicians and that’s because politics pretty much embody everything Twitter is about: Giving morons unfettered, uncensored platforms to talk about whatever the fuck they want. What can we learn from bloated personalities like Donald Trump and Kanye West? A skrong internet performance, especially on Twitter, gets you followers. And more followers means more sex, money and drugs. Because that’s how the Internet works. So, let's work it.

  • Olinki Anuaoki

    strong*. You’ll never be a credible publication unless you copy-edit before publishing.

    • Lawrence

      You’ll never be a credible Four Pins reader unless you understand the concept of “skrong”.

    • Dude Really…

      skrong*, check context before publishing comments bruh.

    • Taylor

      You clearly shouldn’t be reading this website.

  • Cliff

    What is this “strong” word you speak of? Herbs out in dese skreets. I mean streets. No I mean skreets.

    • Lawrence

      +infinity

  • Booger Snitzle

    Who fucking cares about twitter anyway?

    • http://theoraclepieces.blogspot.com/ Geovane M.

      You do – enough to click this, read it, then comment.