2013: Year Of The White Girl 2.0

Last week, the collective Internet watched in enthralled horror as Amanda Bynes shamelessly announced to the world her desire to have Aubrey "Drake" Graham murder her vagina. We marveled, aghast, at the destruction the same way we do sitting shotgun, recklessly rubbernecking to see a flaming twenty car pileup, charred devastation strewn about the guardrail. While everyone joked at the downfall of another teen idol and unnecessarily unpacked the downfall of another teen idol, the Four Pins brain trust turned wide-eyed, for we had found the glorious tipping point we had been searching for all along. See, we've noticed something for a while now, bubbling, percolating in the ether: White girls are evolving. For the past year, the general ratchetness of our universe, and what can only be described as the divine intervention that birthed it, has been spilling over, affecting everything it touches, particularly Caucasian members of the fairer sex. But for every sociological think piece of this magnitude, findings need credence—true objectivism. So, we reached out to the one man privy to such knowledge, an established pioneer of white girl anthropology. That would be Pauly C, better known to the Internet at large as netscapeshawty. Our expert's thoughts are presented as follows, unedited and unabridged.

  • http://www.facebook.com/hughesbryant Bryant Hughes

    True story.

  • http://www.thirdlooks.com/ Third Looks

    Please do a follow-up post on azn girls

  • Geoffrey

    By fairer do you mean redundancy or feminine?

  • http://twitter.com/klodust Justin L.

    Pauly is funny as FUCK

  • jordan

    since when were white girls not ratchet? yall are racist i swear. people white people on a pedestal claiming that only recently they have become ratchet is just insulting yourselves. get out of nyc for five minutes and take a look at the rest of the country. white trash as fuck.

    -a white girl

    • jordan

      putting*

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000129493274 Greg Harris

        In American pop culture there’s always been an “elite, snob, I’m-better-than-you-cause-I’m-white” group of people that everyone makes fun of. This article is about their daughters, nieces, and ex girl-scouts.

    • Themediabull

      Feel free to rant all you want about the “bigger picture” but aren’t there plenty of free comment section space on Huffington Post, bro? This is fucking FOUR PINS

  • Richard Archibald

    this is a beautiful

  • Alex Rudkovsky

    I would let amanda bynes murder my penis with her mouth!

  • mndlbrt

    having netscape on here is the best thing 4pins has ever done

  • http://twitter.com/Thalittleteacup Trisan W

    RACIST. Because apparently black people are inherently rachet & when white girls act that way its so lololol silly strange.

  • http://www.facebook.com/joel.nesbit Joel Nesbit

    RACIST! Many of these pictures are old. Ice T has been married to that woman for YEARS. Now finds herself in an article about how trashy white girls are now in 2013??? Can we make a black or latina version?? This is so stupid.

  • thetrilltroll

    since when were Vanessa Hudgens and Selena Gomez considered white girls?

  • http://www.DopeDandy.com/ JReddingRHC

    Give me Miley Cyrus or give me death…

  • Tyrone

    And black girls have ALWAYS been ratchet, right?

  • MissPretty

    I love this. And I love Katy Perry’s peacock hair.

  • Lord Mike xo..

    HAHAHAHAHAHA yall foolin’